Dogs

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.  ~ Mark Twain

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.  ~ Ambrose Bierce

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.  ~ Robert A. Heinlein

The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.  ~ Charles de Gaulle

All his life he tried to be a good person. Many times, however, he failed.

For after all, he was only human. He wasn't a dog.  ~ Charles M. Schulz

Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring--it was peace.  ~ Milan Kundera

Happiness is a warm puppy.  ~ Charles M. Schulz

The best thing about a man is his dog.  ~ French proverb

Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.  ~ Emily Dickinson

The dog is the most faithful of animals and would be much esteemed were it not so common. Our Lord God has made His greatest gifts the commonest.  ~ Martin Luther

We long for an affection altogether ignorant of our faults. Heaven has accorded this to us in the uncritical canine attachment.  ~ George Eliot

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.  ~ Mark Twain

Meow” means “woof” in cat.  ~ George Carlin

If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.  ~ Woodrow Wilson

You think those dogs will not be in heaven! I tell you they will be there long before any of us.  ~ Robert Louis Stevenson

I'm half-Irish, half-Dutch, and I was born in Belgium. If I was a dog, I'd be in a hell of a mess!  ~ Audrey Hepburn

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.  ~ Aldous Huxley

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.  ~ Will Rogers

The greatest love is a mother's; then a dog's; then a sweetheart's.  ~ Polish Proverb

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.  ~ Mark Twain

How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.  ~ Abraham Lincoln

The pug is living proof that God has a sense of humor.  ~ Margo Kaufman

It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.  ~ Mark Twain

Dogs never bite me. Just humans.  ~ Marilyn Monroe

If dogs talked, one of them would be president by now. Everybody likes dogs.  ~ Dean Koontz

My little dog—a heartbeat at my feet.  ~ Edith Wharton

The nose of the bulldog has been slanted backwards so that he can breathe without letting go.  ~ Winston Churchill

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend.  ~ Corey Ford

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself, too.  ~ Samuel Butler

All knowledge, the totality of all questions and answers, is contained in the dog.  ~ Franz Kafka

Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge.  ~ Jerry Seinfeld

Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun.  ~ Groucho Marx

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.  ~ Ben Williams

When a dog barks at the moon, then it is religion; but when he barks at strangers, it is patriotism!  ~ David Starr Jordan

A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog.  ~ Jack London

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive.  ~ Gilda Radner

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.  ~ Sigmund Freud

When a dog runs at you, whistle for him.  ~ Henry David Thoreau

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.  ~ Will Rogers

Our dogs will love and admire the meanest of us, and feed our colossal vanity with their uncritical homage.  ~ Agnes Repplier

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.  ~ Andy Rooney

From the dog's point of view, his master is an elongated and abnormally cunning dog.  ~ Mabel Louise Robinson

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.  ~ Ann Landers

I like a bit of mongrel myself, whether it's a man or a dog; they're the best for everyday.  ~ George Bernard Shaw

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.  ~ Robert A. Heinlein

Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has to choose a relative.  ~ Mordecai Wyatt Johnson

A dog has the soul of a philosopher.  ~ Plato

Dogs are my favorite role models. I want to work like a dog, doing what I was born to do with joy and purpose. I want to play like a dog, with total, jolly abandon. I want to love like a dog, with unabashed devotion and complete lack of concern about what people do for a living, how much money they have, or how much they weigh. The fact that we still live with dogs, even when we don't have to herd or hunt our dinner, gives me hope for humans and canines alike.  ~ Oprah Winfrey

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.  ~ Josh Billings